Monday, January 5, 2015

An Urban Junk Journal

Once upon a time in June 2014, I went for a walk and caught a lovely glimpse of the great Universal Mind of urban developers.. in action modifying (in greed I thought), this already good enough community from what it was, to something more? - To be completed in apparently 24-36 more months?  NO WAY! I'd only moved in 3 months ago myself!  Sadly, as my new sanctuary was turning into a zone of destruction, I began seeing the gift of jobs for many, as the taking away of my personal peace & quiet.  If there was ever a time that I'd really rather have peace than be right... This was it.

My bliss and settled state was misplaced when ownership suddenly changed hands & they were doing "inspections," changing signage, renaming the place, and breaking ground on phase II of what I now refer to as "urban junk." My quaint 75075 community has lost its sub-urban charm.

For all intents and purposes, I liked it here.  At first.  So much so that I took this picture.... and

... and turned it into this poster-

This place was modern.  It was fresh.  It was hip.  It was affordable.  It was convenient.  My apartment was brand new.  Never lived in before!  A fabulous look-and-lease special with a ton of free rent and no fees and deposits was he clinker!  Who wouldn't want to be free from bugs?  Scrapes?  Scratches?  Stains?   Noise?  It was a gift beyond measure.  I'd asked the questions about imminent building and development of the beautiful green space at the front of the property and that marvelous grassy lawn just below my balcony...  and they said  there was no development anytime soon, with "Certified Green" as their pat response.  I bought into it.  And as it turns out, it was all very much not the truth.. a lie.

New (and many old) multifamily dwellings are jumping on the "green initiative" bandwagon.  They claim to offer tenants a valuable luxury experience saving them money on utilities, offering energy efficiency and durability, with less maintenance intrusions; And they're conveniently placed close to public transportation, stores, restaurants and other public venues within walking distance to it all!  Wow-wee.. a true urban living apartment community that's ever expanding.  But let this be your warning;  All of this convenience and that "green" bag of chips may not include: noise reduction.

As sure as I know that the greatest desire and gift of every living thing on earth is self expression, I also know that all the neighborhood dogs get to express themselves on what is supposed to be my front yard..  My "green space" view turns out to be the public toilet for pets.  Yikes.  Especially between 5-6pm... the same time I'm looking out with a glass of wine or yoga on my mind..

 And Oliver...  He used to love it here, too!

But not any more!

Because on too many occasions he's been freaked out and chased out of his fun & comfort zone and ...into this laundry room hiding spot.... by the frequent fire alarms that BLAST like a freakin' tornado warning throughout the entire building when the neighbors burn food then open their front door to air out their place... And it's taken the fire marshal anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour to put things back to normal so Oliver's and my eardrums can stop ringing!

Hmmmm.  And what is this?  A dormitory? Another childish frat-boy prank after another wild party and courtesy officer complaint!?  Let's face it, I guess I'd rather have their garbage left outside their door than mine... But not matter where they toss or drop their mess, it smells up the breeze way & invites pests..
their trash outside my front door
their trash outside their front door for days

And just as the weeds in this field don't stand a chance back in June...

 Neither did my sense of peace and quiet that I have been paying a premium to have..  'Cause as it turns out, I can hear every step and stomp and drop and roll.  Every bark.  Every slam. Every load of laundry.  Every shower.  Every flush. Every moan.. And yet: life wants to work; life wants to flow; life wants to express through me the place I call my home.. But:

So I tell myself, coming & going... Peace is the goal.

... But still.. they're building ten more homes just like mine across the road:  7am - 7pm, Monday through Saturday.. including Thanksgiving! for the next 2 years:    beep beep clank clank bang bang.. Oh.  And then there's that choo-choo train out back.  Yes. I said "choo-choo" train.. All day and all night.  Isn't that just grand?

Taken June 2014
Taken January 2015

Taken this morning @ 8:15.
This has been a work in progress since before Thanksgiving! They only work on this an hour or so a day.

And did I mention that the bathtubs here are seriously too small for serious spa junkies like me?
Maybe it's a pet tub?

Because I tend to hold a spiritual framework for every aspect of my life, I must get in the flow and let my grief about this go.  Allan Hendrickson says that any negativity or unhappiness I experience comes from resistance, which comes from not accepting what is.  And so it is, by living with and complaining about the disharmony of my home environment, I keep complicating my life.  I must get out of here if I want and peace and quiet.

I admit.  As life unfolded here over the months, I had become generally discontent... All the while, staying here and swearing that all I wanted was peace, and blaming management because I didn't have any. And all the while, I was unwilling to not express my feelings; insisting that I couldn't find peace because I couldn't get to or stay sleep.  With every complaint, I have brought more and more disharmony.  And the thing is, the place I'd moved from to be here, was the exact same way.  Noisy! Why did I expect another apartment complex to be different?

So now.  I agree that my outer dwelling is as perfect as it can be the way it is.  And I also agree that my outer dwelling is as perfect as my inner thoughts and feelings are.  And I agree that I have been contributing to the "urban junk" by hating it so much.  Complaining about it was not going to change anything about it.  The construction is not going to stop before they're done constructing.  The neighbors will get intentionally louder with every complaint.  The pet friendly management is not going to ask the neighbor to get rid of the barking-ass dog.  They'd just rather the complaining stop.


I moved as soon as I possibly could. January 25th 2015. Edited April 23, 2017.

This article and these photos are protected. Copyright 2015, 2016, 2017 ©JACKIEDROCKWELL. All rights reserved.